Custody Goes To The Dogs
I was watching a segment on the Today Show about a rather new phenomenon, courtroom custody battles over the family dog.
At Dogster we know when a dog is adopted they become a member of the family, an attachment is formed, something not easily broken up even when the family is.
TODAY entertainment correspondent Jill Rappaport, a major animal lover herself, reported Thursday on the latest issue that’s being thrown before judges trying to sort out who gets what when relationships fail. In addition to a pre-nup agreement, Rappaport suggested to co-anchor Meredith Vieira, couples with pets should consider a pre-pup agreement as well.
The problem is, courts still think of pets as chattel, a piece of property assigned to one litigant and not as a living breathing being. As in the case of Doreen Houseman and her ex-fiance who were fighting over their pug, Dexter. Originally after the break-up Dexter was allowed to stay with Doreen, but that changed after her ex found out she was dating another man.
She received a call from her ex threatening she would never see Dexter again. The thought of giving up her best friend was devastating so she went to court in an attempt to keep him.
Since it was originally the fiance who purchased the dog he was sent back to him.
“The judge said he did not want to know about the emotional attachment,” explained Houseman’s attorney, Gina Calogero. “He didn’t want to consider it, because to him, the dog was no different from a chair or a couch. They’re not people. They’re not children.”
Judges do have some discretion, so your case outcome is really dependent upon if you go before a sympathetic or unsympathetic judge. As was the case in Haskoor vs. Haskoor.
Fortunately for Mark Haskoor, not all judges are as coldhearted. When he broke up with his wife, he was devastated when she told him she was keeping their dog, Bobesh.
“We got Bobesh when we were together, and then when we separated, she had taken him with her,” Haskoor said. “When I asked to start seeing Bobesh again, the answer was no.
“It hit me like a ton of bricks. He’s my best friend. He’s part of my family. I’m not willing to let that go.”
Like Houseman, Haskoor took his case to court. But unlike Houseman, he found a sympathetic judge who worked out a joint custody agreement for Bobesh, treating the pet as if it were a child.
Houseman’s attorney, McDonough, went on to say, “There has been an explosion in the court systems of people who want to litigate time sharing and legal ownership of family pets.”
So, what do you think about fighting over Fido? Since we view our dogs emotionally and affectionately, like children, should the laws be changed to reflect this? Give me a bark.
That is really sad. Luckily for me, when I divorced we were originally going to share custody of our 2 Rat Terriers. But, Agnes was just too attached to me and was not eating, and waited by the back door for me to come home when at my ex-wife’s. We decided to split the 2 up, a choice we had tried to avoid, but they are both completely happy now. I miss Otto as my ex misses Agnes, but both dogs are happier this way and that is what is important.
When my ex and I broke up he let me have the dog. Then six months without even a hello he comes back wanting to have partial custody of the dog. Since I paid for the pup I won the arguement. Originally I would have been perfectly okay with sharing custody but it was obvious after six months of no communication he didn’t really care about the dog. If he would have attempted to keep in touch with Indy or come and see him he could still have him now.
I had to give up my two rat terriers in a divorce because I left a cheating husband and had nowhere to go. I lived in my vehicle for two weeks and knew that it was no life for my pups. After I found a place, my ex was not willing to give up either of the dogs. I was heart broken and if there would have been a chance I could have gotten at least joint custody I would have gone for it. Unfortunately at that time in our town (in the South…) animals were not even seen as valuable as a chair or a table, so the case would not have even been heard.
I think it is something that needs to be addressed in the legal system. Times and perceptions have changed and there will only be more of this problem.
I could never give up my “baby.” Bear is the only child I will ever have. My husband has had his family (two grown sons) and he is fixed. So no children for me so on my birthday in 2001 he brought me home Bear. Bear is my spoiled only child and I love him like a child. I would hope that every state will pass laws that allow joint custody. I know if my husband and I were to seperate we would both be devistated if we couldn’t see our “baby” Bear.
It is happening slowly, but a lot of states are starting to view companion animals as family. I have learned this by being a Domestic Violence victim. A lot of state are starting to pass laws to include pets in Orders of Protection. And the American Humane Society is leading the way to having Safe Houses/Shelters set up to accomodate family pets when a victim is forced to flee. Surveys have been done to prove a lot of victims of violence remain in relationships and homes because they do not want to leave their pets. It also shows that the abuser uses the pet as a weapon just like they do thwe children, by threating to kill the pet if the victim leaves. I am a victim of DV and I met another victim who’s pets were beaten and one even shot by the husband. Thank God they all survived. The AHS shelters are called PAWS, Pets and Women Shelter. So why not make it law that in the event a relationship breaks up or a marriage due to inreconcible differences and a pet is there review the closeness of the pet with the animal parents and decide which would be the better animal parent. Companion animals such as dogs and cats are basically the same as children. They are no longer viewed as just an animal. The laws are slow coming about but since Katrina, Rita and now Ike, and the devistation the animals suffered is making people more aware of the bond of a pet. God put them here for our pleasure. They love unconditionally and will never leave us humans alone incase of a crisis as we do them. I have three dogs. A foster I adopted, and two rescues I took in and made mine. They are my family. I have no children, no parents left. No really close family. My only sibling chooses to not be a part of my life because she cannot make me what she tniks I should be. So my dogs are the ones I cry to when I’m hurt. They are the ones who loves on me when I need loving. They are glad to see me when I get home from and sad when I have to go to work. They are what I wake up for everyday. They are what I strive for want to make a better life for. No matter what they are there for me. No man will come before my dogs. And I do all I can to make people aware that these loving creatures are as loving if not more than any human and they deserve to be loved and cared for and not used or abused. So yes, Washington DC needs to make laws to protect and make sure if a break up of a relationship happens, the family pet needs to be treated as a child would be. They hurt just like we do. They have a heart of gold, we don’t.
[...] September I posted Custody Is Going To The Dogs, discussing the attachment we have to our dog, something not easily broken up even when the [...]